Bye-Bye My World..

Tomorrow, i'll move on to the new place.. everything is new to me.. Their lifestyles.. Their environments.. And even their foods.. I still cant accept that.. It's so hard for me to bring myself to the new world.. New friends.. I love my old place.. My friends r in this world.. My heart.. My soul.. My ehem3 (ape ehem3? sakit tekak ke??)... My everything..Hurm...

As he said before, we still have a chance to meet.. But when i keep thinking on it, i ask myself.. When will we meet? we have our own way..our own study..our own life.. and My another friend had challenged me to tell him about my feelings...but still, as i said before, i have no strenght to tell him.. If i have so, of course, why should i suffer like this.. That feeling will kill me slowly.. Time by time..grrrr...

Whatever it is (i try to forget him for a while..[if i can do so..hehe..]..) To my old place, should i say gudbye to u? I dont think so.. Because i love u.. and of course how far i'll go, how long i'll disappear, i'll back to u finally..Hehe... And to my new place, please welcome me with ur warm-hearted so that i can accept ur new lifestyle, environment & foods tooo... And maybe my new boyfriend???? NO WAYY!!!!! :p


- I LOVE U...That's all i really know...-

Bahagia...Gembira...Dan Sedih...

Da lama sy menyepi dr menulis blog..Kalu dulu, tiap2 ari rasa cam nak post je entry baru dlm blog ni..tp skang ni, sminggu skali pun nmpak cam da susah..

Banyak benda yg berlaku spanjang sy 'menyepi' sketika dari dunia blogging..


Hari ni, actually hari yg plg bhgia buat sy.. Sy dating ngn 'dia'..hahaha... utk 5 ari ni sj, da 2x sy jumpa dia..hehe...hari ni, dia mmg ensem sgt2..baju dia..sbijik mcm cover enset sony w800i sy..hahahaha... oren+putih cream2 sket..huhuhu...aih..mmg ensem la dia ari ni...mau nye angau sy pas ni..hahaha... da la duk depan sy...borak2...kdg2 curik2 tgk dia..hehe..((galoksssssssssss...))

lepas kasi adiah kat dia, kitrg pun bawa haluan masing2...sy dan kawan2 g main boling...lepas gian ngn boling utk kali terakhir..dia plak? kalo xslp, dia ckp nk pi servis kereta..ntah..ye kot...

tp kan..hari ni..walaupun hari ni sy rasa bahagia, tp jauh di sudut hati sy, sy sedih sbnrnya.. sy pk, entah bila sy dpt jumpa dgn 'dia' lagi...nnti dia pun da nak sambung blajar da..sy plak, time balik sini, time tu rasanya dia da masuk bljr kot...hurm...sedihnya..

apepun, ari ni adalah hari yg plg bahagia buat saya..mmg bahagia sgt2 utk sy..sy xkan lupakan kenangan ni..28/05/2009...(kena igt ooo)..dlm hati sy...berbunga2..hahahaha..mcm ada baja je..smpai berbunga2..pe da secreto ni...imaginasi melampaui batasan..ahaks..

oklah, nnti ade ms sy tulis lagi..

ari ahad ni sy pindah..

Wish me best of luck..

hurmmm...sedih....(nak jumpa dia lagiiiiiiiiiiiii.....)

Aku Gagal Lagi... Hurm..

Semalam, someone has made me cry for the whole night.. Kul 5 am baru dapat tido...hurm..sedih..memang sedih sangat2 bila dia kata camtu.. xsangka.. sy da cube sehabis baik utk tolong dia kuar dr dunia lamanya.. tapi, semalam, dia ckp dia kembali lagi..betapa hancur luluh hati sy.. betapa beratnya sy nak pikul tanggungjawab utk menarik dia kembali ke dunia nyata..tapi, balasan dia terhadap sy??hurm....

Honestly, sebelum sy berkawan dgn dia, dah beribu2 kali sy pk.. patut ke sy berkawan dgn dia bila sy tau ttg dunia nya..niat ati, xnak berkawan..tp sy cuba jugak..sy fikir, kalo 10 org berfikiran mcm sy, sape lagi yg mampu tolong dia utk kmbali ke dunia nyata...?? sy cuba utk menyelami perasaan dia.. sy cuba utk membawa dia kembali ke dunia yg benar... saya cuba bermacam2 cara.. selama stahun lebih kami berkawan, alhamdulillah, dia ok...cuma, bila dia da outstation, kitorg lost contact for a while..

dan di saat itu lah... dunia hitamnya kembali lagi..hurm..

mula2, bila dia btau pasai tu kat sy, sy bersabar lagi..tp ntah mcm mana, tetibe je, air mata sy menitik..sedih sgt2... rasa macam sia2 je usaha sy selama ni... sy da bg dia dorongan..nasihat..semangat... smua bagaikan sia2...

dan, smlm, kata2 akhir dari dia...

" awak, terima kasih kerana awak da banyak membantu sy.. sy xkan pernah lupakan org sebaik awk.. sy xlayak utk berkawan dgn awk.. awak terlalu baik... seumur hidup sy, sy xkan lupakan awk... sy xlayak utk memiliki awak.. sy lepaskan awk...dan sy harap awak akan temui org yg lebih baik dan yg selayaknya utk awk.. moga awak berbahagia..."


hurm.. WHAT CAN I SAY????

Lafaz Yang Tersimpan..

Lagu nasyid UNIC, Lafaz Yg Tersimpan.. Kalo xsilap, menurut ahli kumpulan nasyid UNiC ni, lagu ni ditujukan khas utk ibu bapa dr anaknya yang tidak tahu untuk menggambarkan perasaan sayang itu terhadap mereka.. Ucapan sayang dan kasih tidak terucap di bibir..Tapi tergambar melalui perbuatan.. Hingga akhir saatnya, si anak tidak mampu utk mengucapkan kata2 itu...

Tapi, bagi saya, ada certain2 part dalam lirik ni, sy suka sangat.. Totally, dia menggambarkan perasaan sy terhadap seseorang.. Dia tak pernah tau betapa sy sangat sukakan dia.. Dia xpernah tau, since dia menapak di dalam hati saya, dia xpernah lari walaupun sesaat.. Bercerita tentang dia membuatkan sy rasa tenang dan gembira.. Satu msg darinya membuatkan hati sy berbunga walaupun msg tersebut hanyalah msg bertanya khabar.. Tapi sedihnya, dia tak pernah tau tentang ni.. Mungkinkah saya akan kehilangan dia atas sikap sy yang berdiam diri ni? Entahlah.. saya pun xtau..

Ni part lagu nasyid Lafaz Yang Tersimpan yang sy suka...

Betapa sukarnya menyusun bicara

Meluahkan rasa menuturkan sayang

Kasih yang terlimpah hanya sekadar tingkah

Cuma ungkapan kebisuan yang

melindungkan kalimah rahsia...

Masih kubiarkan waktu

Melarikan lafaz kasihku padamu

Apakah yang hilang andai dilisankan

Bait penghargaan penuh kejujuran

Tak mungkin terlihat cinta yang merona

Jika hanya renungan mata yang bersuara

Bukan tutur kata..

Kenapa sukar utk sy meluahkan perasaan ini terhadapnya?
Hanya renungan mata yang menceritakan segala2nya..
Tapi boleh ke orang memamahami bahasa mata?
Dan bukannya bahasa yang terlahir dari bibir?
Hurm..

Kalo lah dia tau..kan best..xde lah rasa terseksa dalam diri ni...Macam skrg ni...aih..

Tok Ayah...

Haji Ismail Bin Awang Besar.. Nama yang diberikan oleh ibu bapanya kepada beliau.. Mempunyai 7 orang anak dan 13 orang cucu.. Cicit xde lagi la sbb saya lom kawen lagi..hehe..Semua cucunya2 panggil dia TOK AYAH...

Macam mimpi ngeri je.. Ari jumaat lepas, dia dimasukkan ke wad.. Masa nak gi spital tu, dia ok lagi..leh bercakap lagi.. Asalnya demam je.. tapi rupanya2 ada internal bleeding.. Hatinya dipenuhi darah.. Fully supported wif machine to breath now..

Skrg ni keadaan dia makin critical.. Dah dimasukkan ke ICU..hurm...rasa cam xpercaya skrg ni dia terlantar di katil ICU..koma..xbuka mata since he was admitted to ward...hurm...

Sedih sgt2 bila teringat kat dia.. Skrg ni pun rasa cam nak nangis.. Seriously.. rasa air mata nak menitik.. sebelum ni, bila gi melawat dia, sy bertahan lagi drp menitis air mata.. tp bila duk sorg2 camni..bila teringat kat dia dlm suasana sunyi camni...rasa nak nangis je..kan best kalo sy leh nangis..tapi..sy kena tahan..xleh nangis..xleh nangis..

Hurm.. Tok Ayah.. Harap tok ayah sedar dari koma..Buka mata dan sembuh kembali dr penyakit tu.. seCreTo xleh kehilangan tok ayah... secreto hanya ada sorg je lagi tok ayah dlm dunia ni.. secreto xleh bayangkan kalo secreto kehilangan tok ayah.. gelak tawa tok ayah..suara2 tok ayah..masih lagi terngiang2 kat telinga ni..

Ya Allah.. Selamatkanlah dirinya..

Pada semua kawan2.. Please.. Doakan agar Tok Ayah sy sihat kembali..

p/s: nak menyendiri jap..rasa sedih sgt2..nak nangis...

That's All I Really Know...

Situation:

A father to a daughter says to his daughter's boyfriend, " Stay away from her.."

Without any words, that boy leaves them.. Walk slowly... with full of tears...

Deep inside the girl's heart, that girl says, " I'm begging u..Please don't go..Please...Please come back one day and take me away..."

Day by day..Week by week.. Month by month.. Year by year... No appearance from that boy..

The gurl becomes heart-broken.. She's still waiting for him....But until when??


If u r the boyfriend to this gurl, what will u do??




***********************************

Love Story - Taylor Swift

We were both young, when I first saw you
I close my eyes and the flashback starts
I’m standing there, on a balcony of summer air

I see the lights, see the party, the ball gowns
I see you make your way through the crowd
You say hello, little did I know…

That you were Romeo,
you were throwing pebbles
And my daddy said “stay away from Juliet”
And I was crying on the staircase
Begging you please don’t go…And I said…

Romeo take me somewhere, we can be alone
I’ll be waiting, all there’s left to do is run
You’ll be the prince and I’ll be the princess,
It’s a love story, baby, just say yes

So I sneak out to the garden to see you
We keep quiet, because we’re dead if they knew
So close your eyes
Escape this town for a little while
Oh, Ohhh

Cause you were Romeo, I was a scarlet letter,
And my daddy said “stay away from Juliet”
But you were everything to me
I was begging you, please don’t go…
And I said

Romeo take me somewhere, we can be alone
I’ll be waiting, all there’s left to do is run
You’ll be the prince and I’ll be the princess
It’s a love story, baby, just say yes

Romeo save me, they’re trying to tell me how to feel
This love is difficult, but it’s real
Don’t be afraid, we’ll make it out of this mess
It’s a love story, baby, just say yes
Oh, Ohhh…

I got tired of waiting
Wondering if you were ever coming around
My faith in you was fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town
And I said

Romeo save me, I’ve been feeling so alone
I keep waiting, for you but you never come
Is this in my head, I don’t know what to think
He kneels to the ground and pulled out a ring and said

Marry me Juliet, you’ll never have to be alone
I love you, and that’s all I really know
I talked to your dad-you’ll pick the white dress
It’s a love story, baby just say…yes…
Oh, Ohhh… Oh, Oh, Ohhh…

We were both young when I first saw you.


**************************************

I LOVE U.. That's all i REALLY know....

Kenapa?

Kenapa mesti ada perasaan suka kat seseorang?

Kenapa mesti ada perasaan sayang kat seseorang?

Kenapa mesti ada perasaan rindu kat seseorang?

Kenapa mesti malu untuk menyatakan perasaan itu untuk seseorang?

Kenapa dia tidak tahu yang ada orang sukakan diri dia?

Kenapa?

Kenapa?


Sebab kamu tu manusia..Punya hati dan perasaan.. Sedangkan binatang pun ada perasaan sayang pada anak beranak dia..apatah lagi manusia yg ada akal yg waras utk berfikir... :p






p/s:

Kenapa mesti sy kuarkan entry ni?

--Sy pun xtau kenapa...aih... --